‘The Dark Tower’ Movie Review Roundup: Critics Slam Stephen King Adaptation

When “The Dark Tower” movie trailer hit the internet in May, it received some serious mixed reviews. Several months later, critics have made their feelings clear: it’s not a good movie.

Reviews for the adaptation of Stephen King’s beloved book series were published Thursday, and it seems like most of the critics were disappointed. After over a decade of attempts to get King’s eight-novel series turned into a movie, it seems that the final product is mostly a let down.

“The Dark Tower” follows Jake Chambers (Tom Taylor) as he dreams of a Man in Black (Matthew McConaughey), but they aren’t just dreams. The Man in Black is real (and goes by the name Walter O’Dim) and he is trying to steal the psychic energy from gifted children to take down the Tower, which is essential for keeping our world and several others in tact. Jake travels to one of those parallel worlds and meets Roland Deschain (Idris Elba), one of the Gunslingers. He is somehow immune to Walter’s spells so he is the only one who can take down the Man in Black.

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The plot seems easy to follow and that’s where the complaints begin. Obviously, certain things have to be cut from the books, but the Hollywood Reporter’s John DeFore says that everything that made King’s novels standout was cut. “Heaven knows, the books offer more invention than could fit in one feature film — reading just the first two paragraphs of Wikipedia’s entry on Jake Chambers excited me more than anything ‘Dark Tower’ contains — but in their effort to introduce newcomers to this world, the filmmakers make the saga’s contents look not archetypal but generic and cobbled together,” he noted.

Entertainment Weekly’s Darren Franich wasn’t just displeased that the plot had been simplified, but also that most of the weird or dark elements had been wiped clean. The film felt too sanitized to be the story that readers fell in love with. “So they tossed out the sex, the violence, the cocaine: Fine, thanks, PG-13!” he wrote. “But you can sense some embarrassment, too, in the elision of all the weird bits, the things that would make Roland freakier or his world more unseemly. (Not one finger-eating lobster monster?)” EW gave the film a paltry C-.

Rolling Stone was even tougher, giving “The Dark Tower” just one out of four stars. Peter Travers also complained that the movie was far too generic. “This unholy mess shouldn't happen to a King, much less a paying customer,” he stated.

Several reviews noted that when the film was simplified, certain elements played out too much like devices audiences have seen before. Variety’s Owen Gleiberman also didn’t appreciate how much the film seemed to be borrowing from other franchises. “A few of the concepts drifting through the film suggest how far ahead of the curve King was, a few play as flagrantly derivative, but when you watch ‘The Dark Tower’ you may not bother to separate the Kingian from the Jungian from the ready-made-for-DVR-ian. It all fuses into a glittering trash pile of déjà vu action pulp,” he wrote.

While Elba and McConaughey are established actors, and some of the critics felt they did the best they could with the poor material. Vanity Fair’s Richard Lawson appreciated both Elba and Taylor’s acting abilities. TheWrap’s Dan Callahan, however, did not love the performances.

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“As McConaughey swans through scene after ridiculous scene, it’s almost as if he is deliberately aiming for a Razzie Award to go with his Oscar,” the critic wrote. “Imagine RuPaul playing Clint Eastwood and you will get an idea of the mixed messages of his work here, which suggests both fatigue and a brand of steely camp that is entirely his own.”

The Verge’s Tasha Robinson wasn’t as hard on the film, noting that there were plenty of fun moments and insider references for book fans. However, she too noted that the script is just bad. “The script, credited to Arcel and three others (including Akiva Goldsman, also a writer on the comically botched adaptations of ‘Winter’s Tale,’ ‘Insurgent’ and ‘The 5th Wave’), struggles to establish whose story is important, what tone the film should take, and whether this is meant as a stand-alone story where the loose ends can be neatly wrapped up, or a franchise-launcher meant to draw people into a cinematic universe,” she explained.

See the movie for youself to see if you agree with the critics. “The Dark Tower” hits theaters Aug. 4.