Gabrielle Union Shares 'Hard Truth' Of Surrogacy Journey: 'I Wanted The Experience Of Being Pregnant'

Gabrielle Union got candid about her surrogacy journey and shared how difficult it was for her at the start.

Union, 48, penned an essay for Time magazine Friday. In her piece, she shared how her doctor, Kelly Baek, told her in 2016 that her "best chance for a healthy baby would be surrogacy." She admitted that when she received the news, she nodded because of her prior experiences.

"I had been through an adenomyosis diagnosis and more miscarriages than I could confidently count, and all I could do was nod," she wrote. " I was not ready to do that. I wanted the experience of being pregnant. To watch my body expand and shift to accommodate this miracle inside me."

"I also wanted the experience of being publicly pregnant. I would shake off the distrust society has for women who, for whatever reason—by choice or by nature—do not have babies. I had paid the cost of that for years, and I wanted something for it," she continued.

For a year, she tried IVF cycles and only endured more losses. She also planned to take Lupron, which would give her a 30% chance of bringing a baby to term. However, the side effects include early menopausal and breaking bones easily. Her husband, Dwyane Wade disagreed with her decision.

"You’ve done enough," Wade told her.

She recalled that before they married, Wade got another woman pregnant in 2013. They were not in a good place at the time. But their relationship improved when he told her about the pregnancy.

She initially disagreed with Wade's disapproval of her plans to take Lupron. However, he eventually convinced her.

"He looked me in the eye. 'As much as we want this baby, I want you,' he said slowly. 'We’ve lost too much in our relationship for me to be okay with encouraging you to do one more thing to your body and your soul,'" she continued.

The "Being Mary Jane" star added that Wade having a baby so easily and her being unable to conceive successfully left her soul not just broken but shattered into fine dust. In the aftermath, Union eventually opened herself up for surrogacy. They found a surrogate who was a huge fan of the actress. She called her Natalie.

"This is such a trip. I have your book on hold at four different libraries," the surrogate told her with excitement. "So, I guess now I can get a copy, huh?"

Union said, "Yeah." During their meeting, she was convinced that they got the right person to carry their baby. According to Union, the woman said the right words when they were talking over the phone and when she met her, she knew the surrogate was sincere when the latter told her that she has her own children and wanted to share the gift of life she has experienced to others.

"I called D and put him on speaker, and as they directed their attention to the phone, I looked up at them. You’re those people, I thought. You really want to help others," Union added.

The surrogate got pregnant in March 2018.

Union admitted that even after welcoming their child, Kaavia James Union Wade, she still has some unanswered questions on her mind. She was wondering if she and her child would have been closer if she was the one who carried her. She was also wondering if her failure to carry a child would put a ceiling on the love her husband has for her.

"If I am telling the fullness of our stories, of our three lives together, I must tell the truths I live with. And I have learned that you can be honest and loving at the same time," she concluded.