Men Just As Emotionally Invested In Relationship Problems As Women: Study

Relationships can be complicated, especially when problems arise. But is it really true that men are less emotionally invested in relationships? According to the first "big data" analysis of relationship problems, men are just as invested as women.

Most of what is known about relationship problems has come from data based on couples therapy, Charlotte Entwistle, lead author of the new study, published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, said in a news release from Lancaster University. This means the data only includes those who have the means and the time to deal with the problem, Entwistle said. But in their study, the researchers wanted to have a closer look at the problems experienced by the general public.

To do this, the researchers turned to the platform where people nowadays seek help: online forums. The team analyzed the characteristics and language of 184,631 people who sought relationship help on Reddit. The idea was to "create a map" of the relationship problems beyond the counseling setting and to determine "who experiences which problems more," Entwistle noted.

"Our analyses highlight real-world relationship struggles found in the general population, extending beyond past work that is typically limited to counseling/intervention settings," the researchers wrote.

They found communication difficulties to be a "central motivator" for seeking help, while other typically discussed themes were time, casual dating, trust issues and intimacy.

The team also delved further into the data to have a closer look at some of the common ideas people had about gender differences when it comes to relationships.

"For example, are men truly less emotionally invested in relationships than women, or is it the case that men are simply stigmatized out of sharing their feelings?" Ryan Boyd, study lead researcher, said in the news release.

Interestingly, the researchers spotted a rather notable pattern in the data: more men sought relationship help than women. Specifically, 54.62% of those who sought help were men, while only 45.38% were women.

The researchers also found that men actually discussed their "heartache" more than women did. This suggests "men are at least as emotionally affected by relationship problems as women."

"Interestingly, this differs from traditional, professional contexts, where women are typically more willing and active in seeking help for their relationship problems compared to male partners," the researchers wrote. "This discrepancy in findings supports our notion that men may find anonymous, online relationship help settings preferable to in-person contexts, likely due to stigma attached to help-seeking behavior in men."

Moreover, the frequent discussions on heartache also show that the help-seekers are using the platform more to express their distress and seek support rather than discuss the problems themselves, the researchers noted.

The results of the study present different "pathways" to further explore the factors behind "who, what, why, and how" people seek help for their personal relationships. Having a clearer picture of these common relationship problems will help pinpoint ways to prevent setbacks in relationships, the university noted.

"The study's authors also suggest the findings may also help to destigmatize help-seeking by showing how common many relationship problems are, and by showing that men are just as likely as women to seek help in the first place," Lancaster University noted.