Midlife Crisis Triggered By Not Just Spouses But Also By Mothers, Siblings

Midlife depression can derive from marriage problems, but a new study found a person’s mother and siblings can trigger the same tension a spouse does.

Iowa State University researchers found strain between a person’s mother and siblings is linked with symptoms of depression. The study said all three relationships have a similar effect, meaning marriage problems aren’t stronger than the others.

Family scholars have focused on relationships with spouses, since there is an assumption that people leave parents and siblings behind as they grow up. That mentality isn’t always correct, said Megan Gilligan, an assistant professor of human development and family studies who worked on the study.

Researchers found relationships between people and their mothers and siblings change as they become adults and start their own families. Those relationships end up having an effect to a person’s well-being, especially at midlife.

Gilligan told International Business Times it was surprising to see daughters are more impacted by tension with their mothers than sons, which indicates the importance of the mother-daughter bond. Tension between mothers and adult children was a more robust predictor of depression for daughters than it was for sons. As for siblings and spouses, the gender of a person didn’t make a difference, researchers found.

“One reason that mothers and daughters may engage in more conflict than mothers and sons may be the fact that they tend to have such close relationships with one another,” Gilligan told IBT. “This closeness facilitates contact and creates an opportunity for conflict. Also, daughters are more like to exchange support with their mothers than are sons- this additional support exchange also creates additional stress.”

For the study, researchers looked at data from the Within-Family Differences Study, a longitudinal project. Researchers looked at nearly 500 children within 254 families, with a majority of families in the study including multiple siblings. Experts analyzed symptoms of depression and tension among family members.

The findings suggest that professionals, like marriage and family therapists, should ask their patients about other sources of stress, not just tension between a romantic partner or spouse. Researchers also pointed out that people carry multiple family relationships at the same time, meaning problems are not traced back only to problems with spouses or partners.

“Professionals working with midlife adults may not think to ask questions regarding tension with mothers and/or siblings,” Gilligan said. “These findings suggest that in addition to your spouse, there are other family relationships that contribute to overall well-being. Professionals should assess for and address relationships with these other family members.”

A person’s midlife can bring change and transition for many, as aging parents may need to be cared for more. Midlife adults also tend to react more strongly to family tensions than older adults, researcher said.

“[...] Individuals in midlife may also be starting to engage in additional support exchanges with their parents,” Gilligan said. “In particular, they may need to provide their parents with more support than they have had to in the past. As a result, they may be in the early stages of navigating these support exchanges with their parents and siblings. This can be stressful for many families. “

The recent findings were published in the journal Social Sciences.

Midlife Crisis Statistics

People ages 40-59 had the highest rates of depression between 2009 and 2012, according to a study by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Females in that age group and had the highest rate of depression out of any age or gender nationwide. Last year, the CDC said suicide in the U.S. rose between 1999 and 2014. Suicide rates for women were highest for those aged 45-64. Among males, the percent increase in suicide rate was greatest for men ages 45-64.