Prince Harry Reveals What Stopped Meghan Markle From Taking Own Life During First Pregnancy

Meghan Markle didn't act on her suicidal thoughts because she didn't want to hurt Prince Harry, the Duke of Sussex has revealed.

During their interview with Oprah Winfrey, Markle shared that she thought of taking her own life before she and Prince Harry stepped back from their roles as senior royals last year. "I just didn't want to be alive anymore," she admitted in March.

In his new docuseries "The Me You Can't See," Prince Harry revealed that his wife did not go through with the suicidal ideations she had when she was pregnant with their first child, son Archie, because she didn't want him to lose another woman he loved after the trauma he went through following his mom Princess Diana's death.

"The thing that stopped her from seeing it through was how unfair it would be on me after everything that had happened to my mum and to now be put in a position of losing another woman in my life, with a baby inside of her, our baby," he was quoted by Buzzfeed News as saying in the docuseries he co-produced with Winfrey.

"The scariest thing for her was her clarity of thought. She hadn’t ‘lost it.’ She wasn’t crazy. She wasn’t self-medicating, be it through pills or through alcohol. She was absolutely sober. She was completely sane. Yet in the quiet of night, these thoughts woke her up," he continued.

Prince Harry said his wife told him that she thought of taking her own life before they were set to make an appearance at a charity event at the Royal Albert Hall in London.

"I'm somewhat ashamed of the way that I dealt with it. And of course, because of the system that we were in and the responsibilities and the duties that we had, we had a quick cuddle, and then we had to get changed and had to jump in a convoy with a police escort and drive to the Royal Albert Hall for a charity event and then step out into a wall of cameras and pretend as though everything’s OK," Prince Harry confessed.

"There wasn’t an option to say, ‘You know what? Tonight we’re not going to go. Because just imagine the stories that come from that," he explained.

Prince Harry recalled Markle crying "the moment the lights go down" during the event

"I’m feeling sorry for her, but I’m also really angry with myself that we’re stuck in this situation," he shared. "I was ashamed that it got this bad. I was ashamed to go to my family. Because to be honest with you, like a lot of other people my age could probably relate to, I know that I’m not gonna get from my family what I need."

In the docuseries, Prince Harry also spoke about the struggles he went through due to the trauma caused by the loss of Princess Diana and as a member of the royal family. He admitted that there was a time when he wanted to take drugs, drink and do whatever could reduce his anxiety and stress.

Prince Harry revealed he decided to seek help after an argument with Markle where she told him he needed to see someone. He said he agreed because he didn't want to lose Markle.

Prince Harry and Winfrey's new documentary "The Me You Can't See" premieres Friday on Apple TV+.