Top 5 Places Where Moammar Gadhafi Could be Hiding

1. In Plain Sight. Moammar Gadhafi has been, without a doubt, the best-dressed dictator in world history. His gold epaulettes, riding crops and silk sashes would make him stick out like a sore thumb in a crowd of impoverished North Africans. He'd have to ditch the glitzy ceremonial garb to blend in.

2. Italy. Whether he got there by private jet or by rowboat, Gadhafi has an affinity for this debt-ridden European country. Libya was once part of Italy's short-lived imperial ambitions and its current prime minister, Silvio Berlusconi, maintains cordial relations with the Libyan loon.

3. Saudi Arabia. This is the all-purpose fallback for any deposed Arab strongman because the oil-rich Middle Eastern kingdom is founded by and exists solely for a bunch of Arab strongmen. Members of the Saudi royal family don't enjoy seeing fellow Arab princes kicked out of their lavish palaces.

4. Switzerland. This quaint Alpine country banned the construction of new minarets on mosques, which doesn't bode well for a high-profile Muslim extremist seeking asylum. Still, Switzerland loves its neutrality, which might trump its anti-Muslim architectural tastes.

5. New York City. Where else can a complete wingnut wearing fluorescent robes walk down the street and not get noticed? Heck, Gadhafi might even consider running for the equally eccentric Anthony Wiener's House seat.