5 Ways To Stop Feeling Jealous Of Your Partner's Ex
Jealousy is a common factor in almost all romantic relationships -- it pretty much indicates that you want to hold onto that person for long. But, it proves to be a destructive element that even the strongest of relationships can't withstand.
Being in a relationship is a constant effort of building trust and a little shred of doubt can lead everything astray. Jealousy strikes at the very thought of someone getting too close to your lover or trying to trump you in every aspect, and the feeling only gets worse when you picture your boyfriend's ex in that role.
One could even feel the sharp pain in their heart thinking of their partner's ex as a prettier or smarter human being than them -- or at least it seems that way in their mind. There's no rational explanation of this feeling but try not to forget that they broke up for a reason. Most importantly, a person needs to feel secure in their skin to overcome this feeling.
Here are some ways to handle insecurity and jealousy:
Talk about his firsts- Sometimes you are extremely jealous that your partner didn't do all their firsts with you. It's normal to feel the pit of anger in your stomach and all sorts of negative emotions but hearing the stories might bring some comfort to your vulnerable heart. Open communication goes a long way!
Don't compete with the ex- People who struggle with jealousy in a relationship end up dealing a major blow to their self-confidence by constantly comparing themselves with their partner's ex. No one will ever know if the ex was better or worse than them so getting defensive or angry will be the act of self-sabotaging the relationship. It's better to work on your relationship instead of drawing comparisons in your own mind.
Have plenty of sex- Sex is an effective way to maintain closeness and show affection. To reassure that you are invested in the relationship, don't shy away from having a lot of sex. Express yourself physically and emotionally to your lover through sex, making sure that your lover breaks free from the previous relationship baggage.
Control your reactions- It's pretty common for you to react impulsively when someone brings up their past but it's also a fact that no one can ever take away what you have built for the last few months or years. As long as you are confident about yourself, others can't control your reactions or emotions.
Stop overthinking- Never let overthinking get the best of you, instead, come to an understanding that will prove to be beneficial for your relationship. If your partner speaks about their ex, talk to them respectfully and let them know if it genuinely hurts your feelings.