Festivus: The Best Of Rand Paul’s Twitter Grievances

Sen. Rand Paul, R-Ky., has some grievances with the government, some of his congressional colleagues, and even his father, Ron Paul, and he took to Twitter on Monday to air them.
It was the senator’s way of celebrating Festivus, the fake holiday popularized in an episode of “Seinfeld” to revolt against the commercialization of Christmas. It is held annually on Dec. 23.
The younger Paul is no stranger to attention-grabbing. In March, he held the Senate floor for 13 hours to filibuster the nomination of John Brennan to head the Central Intelligence Agency. And on Monday, he gave us one more for the road.
Here’s the best of Rand Paul’s Festivus rant.
It started out with these self-promotions on Sunday:
In honor of Festivus, tomorrow I will be airing my grievances, mostly against Washington. Check back here in the morning.
- Senator Rand Paul (@SenRandPaul) December 23, 2013
"I've got a lot of problems with you people, and now you're going to hear about it!" (Frank Costanza, 1997).
- Senator Rand Paul (@SenRandPaul) December 23, 2013
The next day it was on:
Airing of Grievances begins...
- Senator Rand Paul (@SenRandPaul) December 23, 2013
Here’s what he thinks of bipartisan deals/bipartisanship:
In Washington, "bipartisan deal" is a synonym for "increasing our debt"
- Senator Rand Paul (@SenRandPaul) December 23, 2013
The recent "bipartisan deal" will add 7 trillion more debt. And was hailed as an example of Washington "getting something done."
- Senator Rand Paul (@SenRandPaul) December 23, 2013
One more Festivus grievance about bipartisanship. @CoryBooker doesn't RT me enough.
- Senator Rand Paul (@SenRandPaul) December 23, 2013
Then Paul got what he wanted:
U, me & "feats of strength:" Senate floor, name the time MT @SenRandPaul A Festivus grievance re bipartisanship. Booker doesn't RT me enough
- Cory Booker (@CoryBooker) December 23, 2013
Just so the Senate knows (here’s looking at you Majority Leader Harry Reid):
Let's move on to the Senate. If you want more bipartisan cooperation, talk more not less.
- Senator Rand Paul (@SenRandPaul) December 23, 2013
Allow more debate and amendments. Don't change the rules to run it with an iron fist.
- Senator Rand Paul (@SenRandPaul) December 23, 2013
In response to some of your tweets, there will be no feats of strength, and I have no plans to end Festivus by wrestling with Senator Reid.
- Senator Rand Paul (@SenRandPaul) December 23, 2013
A jab at President Obama and Obamacare:
I liked my plan. I did not get to keep it.
- Senator Rand Paul (@SenRandPaul) December 23, 2013
Mad at dad for this:
My Dad auctioned off this car instead of giving it to me. http://t.co/WcJKiJbAcf pic.twitter.com/sArpHLKmhW
- Senator Rand Paul (@SenRandPaul) December 23, 2013
The NSA:
The NSA. I need more than 140 characters for this grievance.
- Senator Rand Paul (@SenRandPaul) December 23, 2013
Claims that his hair is fake:
I have a small grievance -- with people who think my hair is not real.
- Senator Rand Paul (@SenRandPaul) December 23, 2013
Congress
Congress passes too many bills with too many pages that no one has read. I have proposed a Read The Bills solution, a waiting period.
- Senator Rand Paul (@SenRandPaul) December 23, 2013
Obviously some of those grievances were serious and others in good fun.
Though we have lots of serious issues, I also think we need to lighten up a bit. Hopefully we did that today!
- Senator Rand Paul (@SenRandPaul) December 23, 2013
If you want to read more of Paul’s grievances, check out his Twitter handle @SenRandPaul.
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